Friday, 8 September 2017

Weird Dreams: episode three

Once upon a time, I ate a Burger King whopper, a wannabe poutine, and some onion rings with zesty dip at eleven o'clock at night.  Oh.  And I drank a coke, so I couldn't fall asleep until one thirty. And, fine, it wasn't really once upon a time.  It was last night.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The day started out quite normally.  Kyle and I walked with the kids along the streets of the Market in Ottawa. We were surrounded by family.  Sheldon, Shelley, and the girls suggested going for poutine and beaver tails. We, of course, loved the idea.

Once we were done eating, I found myself with the kids and my dad at a campsite with cabins.  We were spending the day fishing.  Anthony did was Anthony always does and caught a monster. Literally.  


Before he could get it on board, the wind picked up and we found ourselves in the middle of a hurricane.  Dad fought to get the boat back to shore without getting tipped over.  The temperature started to drop and the snowflakes stung my skin where they connected.

I handed the kids their bunnyhugs and pulled mine on, hanging on to the side of the boat for dear life.

"We're not going to make it!" yelled my dad.  "We're going to have to jump!"

I glanced at the water and was shocked to see it had turned to ice.  Dad threw his tackle box on it to see how solid it was.  When it didn't break through, he hopped off, the wind almost carrying him away.

"Dad! Duck!"

A palm tree narrowly missed his head.

Following his lead, we ran to shore.

Safe in our cabin, the kids decided to play outside as the sun came out.

"Mom! There's some dolphins stuck out there!"  Ashtynn came into the cabin, crying.

I frowned.  "There aren't any dolphins in Saskachewan, honey."

"But mom, I swear!"

I head out to see what these dolphins might be and stop short.  "What is that?"

Emery dumps a netful of dog hair at my feet.  "It's Smokey hair.  The dolphins can't breathe because it's plugging their blow holes!"

I gaze around to the twenty five or so people frantically scooping dog hair out of the lake so the dolphins can breathe.

One of the dolphins calls out as someone manages to lasso it around the neck.  It promptly turns into a lynx that is chained to a stump.

"Careful! They don't give you much room to maneuver." 

I look up to see who has a hold of my arm and blink.

"Hi.  I'm Jeremy."

Holy shit. Jeremy Renner just saved me from being eaten by a lynx the size of a tiger!!

"They turned a while ago.  The owners haven't had the heart to put them down."

I look more closely at the zoo animals.  All of them are chained by the neck to a stump. All of them are... zombies.

A tiny growl/bark comes from behind me and I turn.  My yorkie is a zombie and tied to a post.  Freya barks and barks and barks.

"Freya! Shut up!"

She doesn't stop and I swat at her with my arm.

"Stupid puntable."

I sit up in bed. Leave it to Freya to start barking when I'm just getting to a kickass Jeremy Renner / Zombie apocalypse part of a dream.  :D

Oh well.  Until the next one.  Hahaha! Weird dreams, everyone!